George Starostin's Reviews



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David Dickson <> (16.01.2006)

Starostin: . . . I AM Bill Shakespeare. I am miracle ingredient Z-247. I am--

Dickson: CRAZY! THAT's what you are! CRAZY!!

Prindle: Jeez, keep it down, will you guys? (looks around the squadron officer's club trepidaciously) Everyone's LOOKING at us.

Dickson: (tearing up) You're CRAZY. You've got a Jehovah complex. . .

Starostin: I think everyone is Nathaniel.

Dickson: (in mid-sputter) --gah--uh--wh-who's Nathaniel?

Starostin: Nathaniel who? (innocent look)

Dickson: You--you. . .

This conversation reportedly overheard upon Dickson hearing that George Starostin declared Heart's debut to be superior to Boston's. Nothing more will be said on the subject.

But HEY! Not a bad album for what I was expecting. I agree that the album tracks on here are every bit as good as the singles--quite a feat for a mainstream late-'70's rock album--but I never much liked Heart's singles to begin with, to be honest. The only thing "Magic Man" has going for it is the lengthy instrumental section; it takes brains to come up with something like that. Quite clever and well-arranged; obviously, these girls know a thing or two about atmosphere. Tell that to Uriah Heep and Kansas. (Yes, I've just decided that Kansas do, indeed, suck. Break out the beer.) But I hate hate hate the overall vibe of the verses and chorus. Bad contrived gypsy bore-mysterio-blah of the '70's, one that they play every damn hour on the radio, no less. Yuck. And it's made all the more apparent by a GOOD contrived gypsy mysterio-blah song three tracks later that they DON'T play on the radio! So far, this is the only band I've heard to nail the SPIRIT of mystic Led Zeppelin in one of their songs, and "Soul of the Sea" is it. Very very authentic-sounding mysticism, and light-years ahead of other "mystical" bands.

Ever notice how "Crazy on You" and "I'll be Your Song" have disco beats? Damn late '70's. Damn them to hell.

And the last three songs kick some amount of ass. Puts a good "end of album/credits rolling" taste in your mouth, something I wasn't expecting from Heart, and something nearly every indie band to ever exist INTENTIONALLY forgets. End the album well. End the album well. No, DON'T end the album with a lightweight joke punk song about college sex! End the frickin' album well. Heart does that. "Dreamboat Annie (reprise)" is a great closer, and much better than the other two "DA"'s that precede it. Decent album. On a scale of one to ten, I give it an 8.5. Just pray to God you'll survive the required three listens through their multi-platinum (!) self-titled album, GS. If you ever want ample evidence of the '80's mainstream being poison to '70's bands, look no further than there. In fact, take it as evidence of the '80's mainstream being generally poison, period. Def Leppard still fuckin' rules, though.


mighty sahara <> (10.12.2005)

'Barracuda' was not about the person 'Magic Man' was written about.


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